So the Ex got home from work super duper early and wanted me to come with him for errands because he wanted to get a new coat and wanted my opinion on what to get because he "has no fashion sense what so ever" in his words. Aww, flattery? :P Not sure, or maybe he just wanted me to get out of the house or something? Probably both, because he did indeed ask my opinion on every jacket/coat he was looking at. He ended up picking one that looks pretty good.
So okay, I'll go. I hadn't managed lunch yet, for anyone, no one had said they were hungry since everyone had had a rather late breakfast since it was a day off of school today despite being Friday. So he decides we'll go to lunch (I also got caught up doing homework and still had next to no appetite) so cool, we all get ready and we're just about to go when I grab the garbage bag from the trash can to get it outside. Nothing really out of the ordinary right?
I open the front door and there is a COP WITH A GUN USING MY VAN AS COVER!! There's another one in the street with a bigger gun/assault rifle and I squeak, closing the door and yell at the ex "Honey there are cops with guns OUTSIDE IN THE STREET!" and proceed to promptly be in the absolute worst headspace and start crying. What the heck?! I mean... that's not something you just expect to walk out the door and see around here! It's just, I just, we gathered the kids to my room and we sat on the floor and I just didn't feel good at all.
I guess one of the cops noticed me because eventually there's a loud knock at the door right as the ex gets a phonecall from someone at work and I'm all "Honey the door! Please get the door!" and he doesn't, he just answers the phone and I'm freaking right the heck out! Finally he excuses himself when the knock comes again. It's the cop with the darn rifle and he says sorry for scaring us but there was a possibly armed suspect (of what?!) down the street but they've taken him into custody and everything is okay.
I wasn't okay! I mean, I rarely see the cops aside from driving and all that and just to have them right outside, with guns, right there and one of them sneaking around the cover of my mini-van?? Holy crap!
I did manage to go out though after that, surprisingly. Though going out to eat and manage shopping wasn't so great. I did manage without being too bad, but oh god am I just not doing so great. Still, I could have managed a bit worse, I know I could have managed worse, I mean I've been worse on more normal days than today turned out to be.
Amazingly, despite it all, I did manage to complete my homework and make some revisions to a previous assignment that were optional.. but I guess worth doing anyway. I could always go do dishes, or clean up my bedroom some, or finally get around to that shower, or just go lay down....
But I think instead I am just going to veg for a bit and listen to random music videos on YouTube.
I'm still trying to get the freaking will to go make those brownies. I want brownies, dang! I forgot to look at Wal-mart (where we went) for brownies! *sigh*
Maybe I should blast some rock music and attempt to clean? GAH!! I hate when I'm like this. :(
~Shattered
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