But I enjoyed it none the less! I actually got an hour and a half in Wal*Mart all alone. I went a TOUCH overboard and the kids will be a TOUCH spoilt! But it's a holiday, and it's fun to do so!
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Hey, did you know it's the 16th? In a month and three days my baby... as in my littlest baby will be 5! AHHH!! How's that happen?! I've got two birthdays coming up after this holiday. @_@ Shooooot!
5 months from now my baby.. oldest baby is going to be 11. T_T Say it's not so! yeesh! We did this "girls night out" with free pizza and a show on puberty and the hormone, period, tampons and pads thing at her school on Wednesday night. I actually got home from Therapy and had about 45 minutes before we had to go to that. I can't believe she's growing up.
I can't wait to share the pictures of the kids on Easter morning!! EE!! Holidays are stressful but I must admit I absolutely LOVE making their faces light up on Holidays and things!
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Sooooooooooooooooooo...
About Easter shopping.
I managed alone in Wal*Mart with ALL of that stuff without needing a single anxiety med! I am absolutely proud of myself! I even managed at dinner without one too! Granted I ALMOST need one when my bank card was declined because I had made an order online and it rung through as clear in NY so they flagged it as suspicious! @_@; I had to use a different card and then I called the bank after going to the ATM and it was all "your card has been flagged for unusual activity" and I nearly died.. .Holy crap that sort of thing scares me.
And it's absolutely mortifying to have my card declined! Like, punch me in the gut everyone is staring at me please let me die now! mortifying! More so when I knew I had the money in my acct.
*sigh*
Thankfully, after calling and confirming, why yes.. yes I DID place an order with said company... everything was fixed and thus came the long complicated attempt to figure out what to get at Wal*mart for four kids for Easter trip.
I will admit I went a touch overboard. Granted.. yeah. okay..
I'm making up for LAST Easter!
The Disaster year when I didn't get to get any Easter shopping in until the DAY before, which meant that there was JACK ALL left so that... it just... I hated it. I felt like a failure that it was so.. Jack!
I know it's strange, but I never want the kids to go without a Holiday, or a birthday treat. Or without me there on their birthday, or to celebrate them in someway as well as the holidays that are just important and fun. That's why I make sure that I pay attention to their class parties. Volunteer to bring goodies, make sure they have extra awesome things to bring in, and teacher gifts..
I never want them to feel as lonely as I had to on holidays. Never want them to spend a birthday accidentally starting an oven fire because no one else in the family cared enough to be there. No one cared to buy them a single present. A birthday cake.. or anything like that.
I never ever want that.
I want to make sure that they'll have a special treat brought to class so they can celebrate their birthday with all their classmates. Even if it's just a cookie per kid, a cupcake, a brownie, something. That's why if they get a birthday invite I will try and make sure they get to go, and that if they want a sleep over I will attempt to make one work despite my issues with letting people into my safety zone from the world that is my house.
That's why I'll come to school and stand there holding our pet crab in a class of noisy excited 2nd graders thrilled to see him.. even though inside I'm panicking at being surrounded like that and having so much attention at me while I stand there.
I don't.. want them to think I don't want to be there. I don't want to do those things.
I do.. and I will..and that's why.. despite myself.. and my fears and everything else..
I want them to have these memories.
The cookies for a class party.
The excitement of an awesome Easter Basket waiting in the morning.
The Sushi on Thanksgiving.
Cinnamon Swirl bread french toast just because.
A small box of chocolates and a little toy treat on Valentines day that they didn't even 'expect'.
The getting to decide their birthday Dinner on their Birthday.
The yearly free ice cream cone from Baskin Robins because they do that.
Standing around outside encouraging them to ride their bikes despite my complete discomfort and lack of leaving the house unless I have to do something. I HATE standing outside.. but I'll do it... for them..
I want those childish memories for them to go on and on despite everything.
Despite my being busy with school.
Despite my depression.
Despite my BPD.
Despite my being lonely and feeling like I am drowning daily.
My insomnia and often extreme tiredness as a result.
*sigh*
Anyway..
The evening went okay..
At first the youngest was upset that she couldn't come with me. I told her she couldn't, unless she didn't want anything for Easter because the stuff is a surprise. She decided she'd like an Easter, and stayed with her dad for the two hours it took... roughly anyway.
So. Here's some of the Craziness that is Easter Shopping at Wal*mart.. holy.. @_@
Please forgive my pic ho'ing! keep in mind I DID take most of these because where BF is, they don't really do Easter AS big as we tend to do it here in the states. so I was snapping pics, and texting them to his email so he could see. Even then I didn't take pics of the last three aisle's of things! @_@
These were the biggest bunnies I saw. Aside from Pillow Pets.. Not as big as the big bunnies that they had in the store where BF works. But those ones were more expensive, and shipping'd be insane. We didn't end up deciding to go this route, though.. they're super cute and I sorta wish I would have.. hmmm
This one is sideways... oops.! I wanted to show him some prepackaged baskets. Maybe I should have gone this route? May have been a touch cheaper.. >.> But.. less.. personalized.
Look! Random little toys and things plus a few more pre-filled baskets!
These are the bunnies that we decided to get. They came with a little bag of jelly beans. I think the kids will enjoy that. At least, the two middles will! They seem to enjoy jelly beans the most!
Plastic eggies! and some candies..
Aisle full of candy @_@.. It's NUTS just how much candy there is!
More things, and pillow pets. They're cute and all, but I am not sure about $20 per pet for just Easter. Maybe Birthday... Yeah.. maybe.
More candy, peeps, cotton candy, and some decorating stuff.. I should have gotten. I think I'll return and get some. We'll.. hmmm make the bunny some cupcakes or something? That'd be cute!
Yay for baskets! I think I'll just have the kids gather theirs from last year and put them upstairs in anticipation for the bunny. I think they'll like that!
More candy, I believe this is where BF was shocked because they're lucky to have maybe half an aisle of Easter things where he lives!. @_@
At this point, even I am surprised at how much candy is here! I wish it was closer to Easter. So it could be on special. A large part of me wants to go and buy stuff, and donate baskets to kids who might not be getting one for Easter? You know, maybe I can find one or two who don't. Have the kids come help me pick out things? Hmmm, that's an idea.
Mini's! Cadbury regular and caramel! I wasn't sure if I should go with both, or just caramel. Went with just caramel, because I am not even sure if any of the kids like the regular.
I have no idea why, but the kids like cotton candy *shudder* I have never liked the stuff. The second it touches my tongue it's as if I'd just dumped a spoon full of sugar on it. o.O texture issue really.
ese eggies come with treats in them, and they're fairly big in size as you can see. I lined them up by kiddo. Oldest has been asking if we have chocolate a lot lately, second oldest asked for sours, and the youngest two.. like these candies.. so they have the exact same things. Also, it stops arguments.
To go in plastic eggies. Yay.
Chalks! Oldest likes green, second likes blue, two youngest like pink.
Cotton candy machine, hmmm I am considering getting this someday soonish. At least then.. The kids can try their hand at making it, and I think they'd super enjoy it!
I'm sure it's obvious who's ball is who's. :P I'll probably sharpie an initial on the bottom of each of the pink balls. To stop the fighting. $1 toys are my friend. XD
Yay coloring books! :P
Finally ending with.. jump ropes. I actually put these ones back, and found better ones! Plus bubbles! Woo! ^_^;; and Easter Grass in the colors that they'd like. I didn't take pictures of it all.. I eventually stopped with the pictures and tried to focus on shopping. :P
Sorry to pic-ho! But it was fun.. Though blogger is VERY upset at me for it, and it's been laggy as all get out..
I'll be happy if.. things can settle down a little.
I'm not expecting them to, but I hope the holiday goes well. Just a week! I can't wait to see the kids faces on Easter morning! Saturday we'll hard boil and decorate eggs!
-Shattered
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